Rapture 2024: They ain’t coming back to this sh*t!

Steph Wynne
4 min readMar 30, 2024

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If they come back they gonna be hungry!

The Rapture is an end time event where relgious people think all dead people will come back. Believers will be resurrected and joined with other believers who are still alive, together will rise “in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air.”

Even Ted Bundy? Even Jeffrey Dalmer?

I was not raised in the church like a lot of black people (African Americans).

I didn’t like the very few churches I did attend.

I was a Jehovah Witness for a minute but they didn’t like me asking questions so I got kicked out a few times at the early age of 12.

I was like you know what? I don’t even need this and decided to just deal with the Creator on my own terms and I don’t need a third party.

I remember I mentioned the way I felt to a doctor client and he said, “Well you Steph you can do Judaism” and I was like I don’t need a middle man.

He was like “Well the Rabbi is very close to God,” or something like that and I was like, don’t nobody have information on where we are going after we die.

Why should it matter? We’ll be dead.

I’m not trying to disrespect anybody or anything but I’m just looking at the bigger picture of things you know what I’m sayin’.

I think the people that are waiting for the Rapture or Armageddon are mad becuz the world is a stinkin’ mess so it must be rapture time. Again.

I remember I was waiting for Armageddon when I was about 12 and when it didn’t happen I start stealing and s*** and just not given a f, but that’s another story.

Because of the state of the world at this time, I can imagine churches are flooded and preachers, reverends and the like are happy to make a few extra dollas!

I remember people saying yeah “Those that have died will be coming back.” They’ll even say, “Don’t say it can’t happen.”

It’s like you know what, even if the people that are dead were to come back, if they can see what’s happening in the world now, they’ll be like “Come back to what?”

A cell phone? Facebook?

They’ll be like, “Why would I want to come back to that s***?”

They’ll just turn over in their grave and chill. They’ll be like, “I’m good. I’ll stay where I am and grab some instant popcorn and watch the world show unravel.”

Even if they did come back, are they going to be coming back as a baby, a teenager or are they gonna come back the way they died?

Will relatives trip the f out? Will relatives ask them to pay rent and tell their dead loved ones to stop asking for fast food cuz they want a big mac?

We’ve seen the horror movies of when they come back and it’s never good.

The Rapture and people coming back is what the religious people say.

People have been saying that since forever. As they always do when the world looks hectic they say “We’re in the last days.” Again.

The last days of what? TikTok (did I spell that right?), Facebook, Instagram, X, or YouTube views?

The last days of you not being able to find a job? The last days of completing school with a master’s degree only to work for McDonald’s for $20 an hour?

Nuclear war or whatever takes us out, even if it does you ain’t going to be one of the survivors.

I don’t even want to survive. To come back for what?

To start over from scratch?

Sure there are plenty of underground bases but who wants to live underground with no internet and people micromanaging the world to bring back democracy!

I mean I’d rather look in on y’all from another dimension. I’ll be like “Damn I’m glad I ain’t there crawling out of a cave trying to re-create a Tesla.”

Like I said, I’m not disrespecting anybody or anything these are just thoughts out loud.

People are pouring into the churches right now trying to be good and trying to get right with the Creator.

I understand, but I just don’t live like that.

When it’s my time I’m good and I ain’t got a problem with the next phase of our lives. But to come back to this bullsh*t nah I’m not interested.

What they gonna do when they come back if the world is still spinning?

Flock to McDonalds for a job?

How they gonna live?

Will they be puffy and filled with dirt?

Will they be a skeleton that can talk?

I’m not being funny or poking at anyone just critical thinkin’.

I’ve told people how I feel and they’re like “Steph you going to hell,” and I’m like good I’ll take a camera and upload some pictures to the internet and videos to Youtube.

Don’t get me wrong I’m not stupid becuz we did not create ourselves so I know there is something greater than us.

The fact that people pray to the sky leads me to believe that whatever created us is off planet earth.

Just sayin’

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Steph Wynne

Business Entrepreneur, Writer, Author, Filmmaker, Web Designer